From: CAblader@ix.netcom.com (David Miles) Date: Thu, 17 Sep 1998 17:44:03 Subject: [sfskaters] Chronicle showing some light Despite the nasty and innacurate coverage last week of the Bay Bridge bike ride, one Chronicle columnist, Ken Garcia, is finally showing some light. Shall we thank the editors, at chronletters@sfgate.com, and thank Ken Garcia as well, at garciak@sfgate.com with some intelligent commentary (making the best of the way Garcia presented the idea, of course :)? Sounds good to me! Access now is an imperative. That sweet victory seems closer than ever despite the misunderstanding last week. Immediate access is so easy to implement and will transform so many things for us. And please remember two things folks: 1) "All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed, second it is violently opposed, third, it is accepted as being self-evident." (Schopehnauer). We are in stage two. Let's get to stage three sooner than later; 2) "Never forget that a [`tiny, radical fringe group'] can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has..." (Margaret Mead) For access now including heavy rail capacity on the new east span, and the freedom to ride on the most beautiful over-water bike route in California, Jason Meggs Here's the article: Street Skate Plan to Cull City's Herds Only the strong may live in Mayor Brown's jungle KEN GARCIA Thursday, September 17, 1998 San Francisco may embrace some of the most questionable ideas and leaders in the nation, but in one key respect, the city is light- years ahead of its time. I refer, of course, to the city's continuing experiment in social Darwinism -- as clever and progressive a program as any in America. This week, a few of our supervisors continued to push the natural- selection envelope, voting to support a pilot program that would put in-line skaters in the same lanes with cars and bicycles. If you see the possibilities here, well, sometimes brilliance is its own reward. Put aside for a moment the irony involved in having the same groups that have worked so hard to ban cars from parts of San Francisco now joining bumpers with their polluting brethren on their way to work. Bicyclists here have long complained that the city is unsafe for pedal-pushers, so you can only imagine the confidence in- line enthusiasts might have while merrily weaving their skates through rush-hour traffic. ``This will take a considerable level of skating ability,'' roller- skating advocate David Miles said, perhaps contemplating the potential jumps in pileups and paramedic calls. I personally think it's a grand plan, but as is usually the case with our supervisors, the program does not go far enough. Why not extend the lanes onto the Bay Bridge or set up a special vehicular skate-pull lane down Interstate 280 to the airport? There might be some initial conflict with tanker trucks, but as Supervisor Mark Leno said, ``It's going to take time for drivers or people to get used to this.'' So why not just jump in skate first? And what about adding paragliders into the commuting pool, with special ``tow and go'' lanes on some of our one-way streets? Landings could take place in specified city parks, and there's no end to the potential splash- down sites. Expanding the skate/bike/fly/ drive lanes would be in keeping with San Francisco's push to keep only its hardiest citizens in the municipal gene pool. Think about it. How many other cities in the country control the population by subjecting the citizenry to ridiculous parking rates, fines or a daily ride on Muni? Each year, thousands of people flee our bayfront haven simply because they can't get from home to work and back again, or end up selling their homes to pay off their parking tickets. Sure, other cities have their own successful survival programs to thin out the herd. New York has August, Cincinnati has Jerry Springer and Oakland has the Warriors. But what other town propels its real estate prices to such heights that an average teacher's salary can barely cover the cost of a rental garage? We like our citizens rich, the better to pay for Giants luxury boxes, Symphony openings and charity functions. You want better teachers, go out and hire a private tutor. This survival-of-the-fittest attitude is in keeping with the city's rich and rollicking history. How many runts do you think thrived during the Gold Rush or escaped the vigilante mobs? Who do you think recovered quickest from the '06 quake and fire? And who do you think fared better during the Barbary Coast days -- Wimpy or Bluto? Civic leaders have even been mindful not to disturb natural selection in the animal kingdom. Last year, the supervisors correctly dropped a recommendation to exterminate the city's feral cat colonies. The program was well on its way until right-minded thinkers at the San Francisco Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals flexed their political paws and got the plan killed. This proved a great disappointment to members of the Golden Gate Audubon Society, which noted the age-old conflict with birds, rabbits and other less- hardy creatures. ``Feral cats really pose a problem for the survival of some species in the long run,'' one ornithology enthusiast said, completely missing the evolutionary point. As with all bureaucratic ordinances, the new skating program is being saddled with all sorts of silly recommendations, including age restrictions, directional guidelines, mandatory helmets and even a no-headphone clause. But as with current bicycle regulations, the ordinances are sure to be ignored, creating the perfect climate for reducing congestion on our city streets. And while it's too early to give credit to supervisors for pushing a system that mirrors some of nature's best species-reduction cycles, it's high time we honored His Exalted Eminence for setting the agenda that put many of the programs in place. Mayor Willie Brown's desire to push out the city's aging middle class -- which would like to send him on an Amtrak train back to Sacramento -- and replace it with rich benefactors and potential campaign contributors is succeeding beyond all expectations. With Muni, filthy streets, unkept parks and mind-boggling traffic congestion making life unbearable for average citizens, His Majesty's plan to reduce the peasant stock is working perfectly. So give the skaters, bicyclists and air jockeys all the lanes they want. Let them ride from span to span. And may the strong survive.